For those of you that don't know what one is, (as I didn't last night) here is the definition from Wikipedia:
The fauxhawk (or faux-hawk) hairstyle is an approximation of a mohawk, made without shaving or buzzing the hair on the sides of the head, allowing an imitation of the look of a true mohawk without having to commit to removing most of one's hair. Here is a pic from cropshop.com
They should also add that wearing one is a public indicator that you lack any sense of personal style or originality. Does everyone think they look like David Beckham? I don't think so. If you look back, the mohawk has evolved from Native American tribes to the famed punk tall, spike mohawk and then the Mr. T. look. This variation proves that we have lost any of our creativity. Anyone wearing one is a spineless amoeba. The point of sporting one (from punk times to now) had been to send a symbolic middle finger to the world and display your rebellion against society. What statement does the current fauxhawk variation make? None. Just on precedent, why would you want to wear a hairstyle worn by every other person in the same location as you? Whether it is a bar, restaurant or store, this hairstyle serves as a visual "moron indicator" for the rest of society. To me, it looks like the head of a messed up cockatoo - but maybe that's just me.
Don't get me wrong. I get it. You want to be stylish and trendy. You want to look good and woo the women that you encounter. I am not unsympathetic. That being said, "you never get a second chance to make a first impression" (to quote a famous commercial) and if you are sporting a fauxhawk your first impression is "I'm a mindless automaton that just copies what everyone else is doing. Dude - you're not even CUTTING YOUR HAIR OFF. You're just pretending to. Poser! You missed the entire point of the exercise.
Remember when your mom asked you if you would jump off a bridge if everyone else was doing it? These people would be looking for the end of the line so they could stand in it.
I think I've said all I have to say on this matter.
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2 comments:
You're touching on the cultural phenomenon of Fauxbellion i.e.
I am a punk (but work on Wall street)= Faux Hawk.
I protest wars for oil (but refuse to become Amish)= Prius Driver.
I am suffering for my craft (in a split level duplex on Waverly)=NYU Trustafarian.
Essentially, people are full of shit, since time immemorial and until the big un-bang. World without end, amen.
But isn't it just so much fun to sit back and watch all the little sheep baa at each other and move around in little herds? Here's hopin' someone moves the grazing field right into the middle of Queen's Blvd!
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